“There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give to out children. One of them is roots. The other is wings.”

This quote speaks for itself I think. It is a tricky balance giving your kids both dreams, ambitions and self-confidence, while at the same time trying to help them be down to earth and give them the feeling that they belong.

For us the past years have been a lot about how to give the children roots. Living in another country than your own for a defined period like we do (we are based in Asia for a little over 3 years) can give the whole family a sense of rootlessness. We have no immediate family here, we look and sound different to most of our neighbours, and we also know that we will not stay here forever. My oldest son sometimes asks when we will move back “home”. Knowing that both we and many friends are not permanent residents here is quite special and the kids get used to class mates coming and going. I have worried that they will not have roots. But after almost two years here I don’t feel that way anymore. We have many good friends here and that they might move away does not change our friendship. Communication across the globe is also a lot easier than it used to be and we stay in touch with friends and family via Skype, e-mails and facebook. The kids skype and play video games with friends on the other side of the globe without thinking twice about it.

And when you stop to think about it nothing is fixed anyway. Anything can change. Indeed, if I look back on my own childhood, many things did. What remained as my roots are my family and friends – my mum, my grandmother, my two younger brothers and my friends from back then. Here it goes again – roots is not about possessions or a physical location – it is about people.

That being said we have tried to get the kids physical roots as well. We have a small and very basic shoebox summer cottage (it is tiny - one small bed room with no running water, no toilet, shower, TV or telephone) where we try to spend time during summers. This coming summer will be our sixth summer there (time flies) and the kids are already talking about what they will do when we get there, what they will eat, who they will meet, what they will play and if they will run barefoot or not (yes!). I believe for them this shoebox has come to represent everything that is great about being a kid on summer holiday.

Image via Wikipedia